GRACEFUL THOUGHTS

Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul.” – Henry Ward Beecher
“Gratitude turns what we have into enough.” – Anonymous
“Gratitude is a powerful catalyst for happiness. It’s the spark that lights a fire of joy in your soul.” – Amy Collette
“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” – Melody Beattie
“Thankfulness is the beginning of gratitude. Gratitude is the completion of thankfulness. Thankfulness may consist merely of words. Gratitude is shown in acts.” – Henri Frederic Amielà

Today I woke up really full of love and gratitude.

Not because things have gone my way but because I have literally seen God’s hand over and in my life. Even in times that have rather been hard, God has been more than a rock, friend and father; and for that I am really grateful.

I took a moment of self introspection as I walked to my destination and in that moment I realized God has been there for me even in my unfaithfulness, He has continued to remain faithful; and for that I am thankful.

I don’t know how many things, situations and people He has saved me from and I probably thought I was making the right decisions and yet He has known all along what has been the very best for me.

I can not even explain or comprehend the amount of fullness I felt just reliving and rethinking the times God showed up in the storm and continuously does so; the times I was in dire need of something and He came through and continuously does so.

The times I cried and His ears were open to hear and so were His hands open to receive me when I error or become distant.

Today I wanted to take some time to be thankful for the little things of life. Even when it is not so perfect, there’s a perfect God who is always there for you and for me at all times.

I am sending out some love and positive energy to anyone who perhaps has had a rough ride lately, I would really encourage you to take time and to take on “attitude gratitude” you will realize you have won more than you have lost. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Thursday Motivation for All Superwomen ‼️

Dear Superwoman, I don’t know how you do it, but I salute you. You are smart, you are brave and you will forever rise!
Gift Gugu Mona

I am one who likes it when everything is on my finger tips, I am one who loves it when I have everything under control; however if I am to be honest with you I fail most of the times.

I have come to understand and learn that even batman needs a robin sometimes.

To all the women out there who sometimes feel like there’s so much on their plate, sometimes you feel like a wreck or your world is falling apart. You won’t always have it figured out.

All I can say is “Still when you’re a mess
You still put on a vest
With an “S” on your chest
Oh yes
You are a superwoman”

On one of those days when everything seems so desolate I listen to this song by Alicia keys called “superwoman” it ignites my belief in that better days are definitely coming; and I am still Superwomen even when I could use a little help sometimes.

I am superwoman not because I am a know-it-all, I am superwoman because even on a bad day I wake up and do my best. I am superwoman because I break down when I need to breakdown; but I do not stay down, I get back up and move forward. I am superwoman because I am rare, a beautiful mess , unapologetically myself; comfortable in my own perfect imperfection. I wear my true essence and çrown of beautiful without putting others down.

Some Monday Motivation 🌞

“Either you run the day or the day runs you.”
– Jim Rohn
 

I am really not a morning person sometimes, even though I have no problem with waking up 😅

Today was that day I did not feel like getting up to prepare for work. The past few days have been emotionally draining for me. As I dragged myself to take a shower it just hit me.

Deligence is consistency in doing something whether you feel like it or not.

Background story

I recently graduated from university and, well, finding employment hasn’t come so easy. Just to keep myself busy I decided to start volunteering as a counselor (even though it’s not my speciality) at an organization that deals with gender based violence, defilement, child support/ custody and rape cases. It’s been an eye opening and also very educative experience.

Sometimes, my human nature kicks in, I feel lazy, tired and even emotional to go for work.

Today I remembered to be deligent and committed to work despite of how I felt.

Todays motivation is, no matter how you feel, no matter what is happening around you, even when life gets in the way; wake up, get up! and do it. You’ll get very little done if you always depend on doing things based on how you are feeling.

It is quite imperative to also watch your thoughts on the morning. What are you feeding your mind when you wake up?

Tell yourself you are important, you are beautiful/handsome and you are going to have thee most eventful, amazing day!

Have a blissful week filled with love, peace and so much joy!!!!!

Wanna kill yourself? Imagine this! #SuicideAwareness

Disclaimer: this is a repost!

You matter. That smile you shared could be the sun on someone’s darkest day.
Amy Leigh Mercree

You come home from school one day. You’ve had yet another horrible day. You’re just ready to give up. So you go to your room, close the door, and take out that suicide note you’ve written and rewritten over and over and over You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time. You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time. A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you dinners ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep. He tells your mom this. Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it. Sobbing, she tries to wake you up. She’s screaming your name. Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that “Mommy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.” Your dad runs to your room. He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry. Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying.

The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent. Everyone blames themselves. Your teachers think they were too hard on you. Those mean popular girls, they think of all the things they’ve said to you. That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are. Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you.. He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and runs out of the school. Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late. And your best friend? She’s in shock. She can’t believe it. She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad… Bad enough for you to end it. She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor. Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out.

It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came. Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality. The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on. Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot. Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young. Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot. You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him. Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days. It’s two years later. Your teachers all quit their job. Those mean girls have eating disorders now. That boy that used to tease you cuts himself. Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love anymore and just sleeps around with girls. Your friends all go into depression. Your best friend? She tried to kill herself. She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried…your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death. He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide. Your parents? Their marriage fell apart. Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death. Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.

People care. You may not think so, but they do. Your choices don’t just affect you. They affect everyone. Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for. Things can’t get better if you give up. I’m here for absolutely anyone that needs to talk, no matter who you are. Even if we’ve NEVER talked before, I’m here for you. Copy and paste this as your status to show people there are people out there that care.let’s see who actually read all of it.

For anyone that feels this way
Could help 1 friend, please copy and repost (not share)? We are trying to demonstrate that someone’s always listening.

Encouragement

This song has been blessing me whenever I’ve felt low. To me it’s a reassure of how anything is possible with God. I hope it blesses and ministers to anyone reading.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; Though the waters thereof roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof. Selah. There is a river, the streams whereof shall make glad the city of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the most High. God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early. The heathen raged, the kingdoms were moved: he uttered his voice, the earth melted. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah. Come, behold the works of the Lord , what desolations he hath made in the earth. He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire. Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah.
Psalms 46:1‭-‬11 KJV
https://bible.com/bible/1/psa.46.1-11.KJV

Commemorating suicide prevention day ❤️❤️

I wrote this to share my experience with someone and just let you know you’re not alone, you’re more important and stronger than you think, you are deeply loved and suicide isn’t the answer.

Suicide doesn’t end the chances of life getting worse, it eliminates the possibility of it ever getting any better
Tough times don’t last, tough people, do. Everybody wants to be a diamond, the more it is cut, the brightest it sparkles. Remember, diamonds are created under pressure from dirty coal.
The person who commits suicide dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand… why? — Clark
Place your hand over your heart, can you feel it? That is called purpose. You’re alive for a reason so don’t ever give up

My earliest experience with suicidal thoughts began when I was 17, I just felt so unwanted, unloved, uncared for; I felt irrelevant, like I didn’t matter! I hated myself and I hated being alive even more. I felt so alone and no one understood me.

One day, I sat outside and started to plot my death. I didn’t care who I was living behind or what pain I would cause to others. I just knew I wanted to kick the bucket!

Thank God I talked myself out of it! See the thing about suicidal thoughts is they only come in the moment. DO NOT HEED TO THEM.

My second experience was when I was in my second year at University. My life was upside down, nothing made sense, I was miserable. My grades were not doing so well, I didn’t like where I was staying. There was all this pressure smothering me.

One day, I misplaced my specs, I did not know something so minor would trigger me. I tried to ask my roommates at the time and they literally hid them from me! I felt like I was being bullied because I really did not talk much so I just cried. I was already having bad anxiety episodes and panic attacks.

I decided to go home to clear my mind. The triggering point for me was when I overheard my mum telling someone I brought her problems and I wasn’t supposed to come home! To me that’s the last thing I wanted to hear especially from a parent.

I decided to swallow a hand full of pills

After a rush to the hospital, lots of water and throwing up, I was back home. I talked to my mother afterwards and told her everything and I’d say we even got a bit closer…

I was later told that I was laughed at behind my back and people thought it was just a heartbreak..

Yes! I was heartbroken! By the fact that what was supposed to be my support system turned out to be people that even mocked me. I didn’t expect to be understood neither did I expect to be sympathized with.

Since 2017, I’ve gotten better! Have I had suicidal thoughts? Yes! But I don’t let them build up anymore!..

You have a bright future

Your situation won’t last a lifetime!.

You are loved, cherished and adored even if no one shows you, I’ll tell you there are people who care and are willing to hear you out! I am willing to listen! You can fight this life and joy stealer. You are not a nonentity, you matter‼️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

🚫 STOP BODY SHAMMING ‼️‼️

In this post I share my experience with body shaming and what I’ve learnt.

“My great hope for us as young women is to start being kinder to ourselves so that we can be kinder to each other. To stop shaming ourselves and other people: ‘too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall, too anything.’ There’s a sense that we’re all ‘too’ something, and we’re all not enough. This is life. Our bodies change. Our minds change. Our hearts change.” —Emma Stone

I didn’t even know I was body shamed.

Growing up I had a short stature and I was small. I didn’t even realize it until people made mention of it. I was given names such as ‘small one’, ‘tiny’ or ‘last born’; and I would laugh it off really, but deep down it hurt me because it started to creep it’s way to my subconscious mind.

It made me feel so different from everyone else. I started to stretch myself really hard thinking I would grow tall 😂 I even began to write red markings on the wall just to measure my height. (I don’t think it worked)

After I graduated from high school I finally came to a place where I started to appreciate this small physique. It no longer bothered me that I was small or tiny. It actually started to bother me if I wasn’t the ‘smallest’ in the room; because that’s what made me stand out.

Before I went to University I started to gain a bit of weight and I enjoyed that. You know gaining in the right places 😂 let’s say I wasn’t mad. However, in my first semester; due to dietary changes, I began to drastically lose weight. I wasn’t eating like the way I would at home. There were times when I didn’t even bother eating and I didn’t even notice I had lost weight. I stopped wearing jeans because most of them were loose.

One day I looked at myself in the mirror and I could literally see my bones just sticking out. To make matters worse, someone told me I was looking skinny.

Well fast forward we indefinitely closed school and boy did I make it a goal to gain weight. I would consume raw eggs and milk on a daily basis. I started to do squats and hip bridges specifically.

When schools opened, I was still called tiny and small but to be honest it didn’t bother me as much. I think I just had other things like catching up on my studies to worry about.

I remember sitting with some people I thought were friends at that point and one of them literally started comparing my body to another girl. And she said she didn’t want a body like mine. That statement hurt me because no one wants to be compared. That’s literally someone telling you,”you’re not good enough.” However, I didn’t say anything to them, I’ve always been one to keep hurtful things to myself. I just sat there letting these people talk about my body and making comparisons to it

(Fast forward to post University) I was no longer surrounded my books, grades or assignments. So my body started to transition again. (I don’t know how body transitioning is connected to school but I think I was just stress free😂, see school is a problem, I’m kidding stay in school, school is good😆)

I started to gain weight, one time my aunt looked at me and told me I had a beautiful physique. I wasn’t accustomed to hearing such compliments that I literally did not believe anything she said. People started to notice my weight gain and would compliment me; and because I wasn’t so used to it; it made me feel uncomfortable.

Someone told me I looked more of a woman now and not a little girl. Even then I didn’t realize how such comments weren’t so nice. Someone close to me told me to watch my weight or else I would become “overweight” or look “disfigured” as they put it. I was told to do squats to make my bum look more perfect. I did not know what they were talking about because I saw this well crafted person in the mirror that was beautiful, growing and glowing.

I was told stretch marks weren’t attractive and so I should invest in buying expensive oil to clear them. Now they absolutely did not bother me at all.

It was then that I decided to stand my ground; enough was enough, it’s my body and if I was happy with it someone else’s opinion did not matter. I realized this was the only person pointing out “bad things” that only them could see. I also realized they were really reflecting their insecurities on me. And Everytime they make a bad comment now concerning my body I refute it.

LESSONS LEARNT.

1. Love yourself, nobody has the right to tell you what to look like. I love a the lyrics from Kendrick Lamar’s song ‘HUMBLE’ “I’m so sick and tired of the Photoshop
Show me something natural like afro on Richard Pryor
Show me something natural like … with some stretch marks.” It’s normal to have stretch marks, acne marks, dark spots, love handles. God wouldn’t have made them part of us of it wasn’t normal to have them.

2. People deserve to know when you are unhappy with a comment they make. Don’t let mean statements slide; some people deserve to be put in their place. Some people only do so because they are low-key reflecting their own insecurities

3. Your body changes, grows and develops. It’s completely natural. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.

ENCOURAGEMENT

God hears you. He hears what you don’t say. He hears what’s behind what you said that’s really driving the behavior. He hears you. He hears your secret frustration that you don’t say around people because if you told them how frustrated you were, it would scare them. He hears you.
“I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy.” Psalm 116:1 _ PASTOR STEVEN FURTICK

Death, Grieving, Loss and Healing

Death, grieving and loss are extremely hard, I’d love to share my experience of dealing the loss of a loved one, my grieving process and my journey to healing.

The dealing with grief cannot be bypassed. It is a road you must walk, a race you must finish and no one else can do it for you. If you try to sneak through it without it seeing you, it will seep into your life when you least expect it. Grief will not let you go until you satisfy what it came to teach you….Rick Riordan

I lost my father at the age of four in the year 2000. I was young but the peculiar thing about that time is how I remember the events that unfolded; the day he died and the aftermath.

I’ve had to grow up without hearing or saying the words, ‘father, dad or daddy’ I have never come to a point were I felt like I should talk about dads death because it was almost as if it was a taboo. His name was never mentioned and I only saw a few photos of him. We never spoke about him; it was almost as though we were supposed to move on without acknowledging the existence of this man.

This man that was called my father

I grew up not knowing who this man was, what he like or what his personality was like.

From a young age I knew he had died, it wasn’t sugar-coated and I didn’t ask any questions. They never told me he went somewhere and he would come back later, I already understood he was dead.

I would say growing up was normal, I knew life drastically changed after dads death. I’d say it slightly became harder especially for a single mum. But God is faithful and good… Too good actually.

As I grew older, that gap, that hole he left started to grow bigger and bigger. His absence started to take a toll on me, I’d write letters to get through to him and even cry myself to sleep until my 17th birthday I wrote my last letter to Dad. Telling him I wasn’t going to write to him anymore, I was going away cause I needed to heal. I needed to acknowledge God as my father.

I would always say “I lost an earthly father, but I gained a Healthy father” I would sing, “I have a father that will never ever fail me” He will neither leave me nor forsake me.

I had a very hard time allowing and acknowledging God as my father.

I don’t think I ever fully got over the loss of my father, there are times I remember i was robbed of an experience and I cry.

I miss him everyday, I wish he were here everyday. I wish my childhood was complete as the other kids at school told their home stories. If I’m being honest I was content with having a mum. However, it sometimes came with shortcomings.

Healing!!!!

Grieving is a highly individual experience; there’s no right or wrong way to grieve. It entirely depends on you. For me to be honest I cried a lot for years, I asked God a lot of questions because I wasn’t allowed to ask others. I sat in silence a lot and cried some more. To be honest I don’t think you fully heal, there are days you forget and there are days you remember. It’s like a wound that dries over time but it’s scars are still visible.

Please do share your healing journey with me.

BiBi Foundation_Sonile Banda

The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

In this  time and era there is an outstanding rise of young people who aspire to make a difference.
The challenges that are  faced in the Nation avail themselves as   opportunities for fresh and vibrant minds to come up with  innovative, powerful and well structured ideas for young people to become effective and efficient to  fully address societal problems.

young  people such as the beautiful and vibrant Sonile Banda have purposely decided to rise and take up their rightful positions in their God-given purposes. In this blog post we get to know more about 19 year old Ms. Sonile Banda, founder of the Bibi foundation and what she’s doing for mother Zambia.

  1. What is the main motivation behind the foundation? (Why women? what’s the passion behind women)

The meaning of Bibi means a mother for all and how I came up about the name is through my late mother’s name because she was good person who always helped the vulnerable and also wanted her name not die just like her. What made me take up this project up due to  is I am an orphan and I was also raised by a single mother so I know the challenges they are facing in society, the main person that motivated me is my elder sister.

Why I chose to work with women is because they are given less opportunities, and are mainly taken advantage of because of there vulnerability, I mainly have a passion for women because I consider them as the strongest beings as they are able to bare any pain and are also courageous.

2. What’s the foundation about?

Bibi foundation is all about helping orphans and single mothers (i.e teen moms,widows,female prisoners) and I intend to help them through financial literacy, learning vocation, entrepreneurship skills and as for the orphans it’s through rescuing them from abusive situations, forced labor; feeding a malnourished child,empowering a child to school, giving a child clean water, medical supplies as well as preaching the gospel because not every child knows the love of God

3.What activities are you planning on having or have undertaken?


The types of activities that will be taking place at Bibi foundation are going to be fundraising walk or runs, charitable works, spending time with the vulnerable,literacy only to mention but a few.

4. What impact do you expect to have ten years from now?

Ten years from now I would want to reach out to many lives and change many stories of the less privileged as well as Bibi foundation growing at an extent where it will be an NGO

5. where as an individual do you expect to see yourself a few years?

where I see myself few years from now is being a doctor who is able to give the best services to my country as well as establishing my own hospital and a sepsis foundation that will help people with sepsis.

6.What challenges as a young person and a young woman have you faced?

The personal challenges I am facing is that when am doing my administrative works with my sister for my mother’s estates and monies someone seems to take us  serious when I visit offices I don’t if it’s maybe they see two young women standing in front of them or maybe they want a small amount of money in order for to be done

7.What’s your opinion on a young person such as yourself being told “you are dreaming too big, be realistic?”

My opinion on someone that would tell me am dreaming too big and I should be realistic is that anyone can dream and no one is ever to young or old to dream because who knows maybe your dream can change someone’s life.

My motivational quote is that; make your life a masterpiece, imagine no limitations on what you can be, have or do
  My Bible verse is commit your activities to the Lord and your plans will be achieved~proverbs 16

Final remarks, encouragement, motivation or even a Bible verse.

My motivational quote is that; make your life a masterpiece, imagine no limitations on what you can be, have or do
  My Bible verse is commit your activities to the Lord and your plans will be achieved~proverbs 16:3

Please like and share her Facebook page and get in touch with her for further information on how you can contribute and be part of BiBi. foundation.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=677171272904199&id=663083900979603&tn=%2As%2As-R